Chapter 2 : How to say ‘no’ politely
In contemporary China, full of attractions, entertainment, lust, luxury products and possibilities blossom, 4 reasons you may be avoiding saying ‘no’ to something:
1. Wanting to help-You are a nice person! You don’t want to let a friend down! However what you need to realize is that not being able to do something for someone when you have a good reason does not make you a bad friend. If they think that then they don’t deserve your friendship anyway！
2. Afraid of being rude-A fear of rudeness is a common reason to not put your foot down to something that you otherwise wouldn’t do. However this is a contrived social etiquette rule. You shouldn’t end up getting yourself into an uncomfortable situation because you were too polite to say no.
3. Fear of conflict-If you are one of those people who shies away from conflict you may find yourself agreeing with something that doesn’t suit you just to avoid an argument. However, by doing this you aren’t being fair to yourself. This is something you are just going to have to get over to make yourself happier in the end.
4. Fear of lost opportunities-You may fear that if you say no to something now, the opportunity will never come around again and you will miss out. However, if the time isn’t right for you to take something don’t take it. An opportunity will be ruined more by you being overwhelmed at having accepted something you should have said no to, than if you simply declined to accept.
5 Scripted out ways for you to say ‘No’:
1. “I can’t commit to this as I have other priorities at the moment.”
This is one example of a perfectly polite decline. It doesn’t sound like you are ungrateful or rude, it simply sounds like you have too much on your plate to be committing to something else.
2. “Now is not a good time. How about we reconnect at ______ time?”
This is a perfect way to politely turn down plan propositions from a friend. It shows that you are still interested in the idea, you just need to find a time that works better.
3. “I’d love to do this but…”
This response shows enthusiasm in the offer while making it clear that you simply can’t do something.
4. “I’m not the best person to help you with this. Why don’t you try______?”
This statement offers a solution to the questioner’s problem while making it clear that it isn’t for you.
5. “I’m sorry, I can’t”
Even if you aren’t sorry that you can’t do something, you should make it sound as though you were interested so as not to add insult to injury and risk offending the questioner.